In my view, INTJs can enjoy satisfying relationships with any NP type, with ENTPs , INTPs, ENFPs, or INFPs. However, of these, the INTJ-INFP pairing seems to. This section INTJ-INTP relationship is about how these two personality types come together in a Return from INTJ-INTP to Type and Relationships. Hi, I'm an INTJ in a 4 year long relationship with an INTP. For the most part (aside from butting heads once in a great while due to sentence.
INTP and INTJ – Compatibility, Relationships, and Friendships
While INTJs may not experience the consistent strength of feeling that FP types do, they are nonetheless influenced by the less conscious workings of Fi, which helps inspire loyalty, love, and commitment. This makes it a highly alluring function, powerful enough to inspire a fierce and protracted tug-of-war with the dominant function. Money also relates to status, another Se-related desire.
They may, for instance, feel forced to perform unfulfilling work that fails to utilize their Ni-Te gifts. Or, they may struggle when the quality of a product or accuracy of information is compromised for the sake of marketability. INTJs also hate having to act before their intuition has prompted them to do so.
All of this can make the work life of INTJs rather miserable as they struggle to find a compromise between their Ni and Se concerns. Even the idea of compromise can be loathsome to INTJs, since their idealism and perfectionism are so pronounced. This perfectionism tends to be most acute when they attempt to directly control Se outcomes, such as when making art, performing, or obsessing over money or status.
INTJ Relationships, Love, & Compatibility
When functioning healthily in Ni, however, they rarely fall into the obsessive grip of perfectionism. With that said, pairing with an SFP rarely brings lasting satisfaction to INTJs, since, as introverts, their wholeness must come from the inside out, rather than vice-versa.
INTJs may also happen upon other NJs in their work settings, especially in scientific, academic, or tech-related fields. Overall, ENTJs may be somewhat preferable, bringing a degree of typological variety to the relationship.
They can simply be themselves and feel comfortable employing their normal modes of communication. And when this is combined with the natural power struggles of J pairings, such relationships may fail to get out of the starting gates.
I am an INFP female age I married my ESTJ husband at age It was very much for me as you described. Meeting him felt very nice at that time in my life, when I had no real direction and was floundering around.INTJ & INTP on Introversion
I loved how he came in and swooped me up, making decisions for me and giving my life a direction. I had become so used to denying myself and feeling there was something wrong with me. Always giving in on every issue and not really having a voice of my own. He is a very forceful and dominant personality and after 14 yrs of marriage, I have lost myself.
It has been a light at the end of the tunnel to make these discoveries and begin relearning myself. Simply dusting everything off and really looking at my own needs and desires after all this time is a huge step for me.
INTP and INTJ – Compatibility, Relationships, and Friendships - Personality Growth
I realize I have a lot of digging out to do to get out from under the rubble and debris that has kept me entombed in this marriage for so long. It will be a long process to rebuild my life again. I truly wish this subject was more readily taught and discussed with young adults. Just having a vague understanding could help so many people with life choices.
Careers, choosing a mate, raising children, communicating with spouses, extended family relationships are all things where personality differences come into play. The more educated someone is about the personalities that surround them, the more likely they will be successful in life and able to build a solid foundation around them.
Relationships become tinged with co-dependent behavior as the partners attempt to use one another to supply them with the inferior needs that they enviously wish they could provide for themselves. This is how a love-hate relationship develops.
If the psyche feels that the unconscious inferior function is gaining too much power, the dominant function will readily take extreme measures to wrestle back control, like when we overcorrect after our car accidentally veers into the wrong lane.
When we pair with our typological opposite without sufficient understanding of type dynamics or awareness of the powers of our unconscious over us, we put ourselves at great risk for experiencing this extreme tension and love-hate volatility in our relationships. Therefore, all of our unresolved issues with our tertiary and inferior functions become projected onto our partner and are acted out in our relationships — and usually in very destructive ways.
Typically, the things that initially draw opposite persons to one another end up being the same traits that create conflict and resentment down the road. The unconscious psyche, not one to be fooled easily, realizes that our partner is not an authentic or sufficient substitute for our own psychological growth. In fact, after this point of realization, the partner is actually perceived as a threat, as an obstacle to our further development. Your passiveness is an invitation for him to become more aggressive, and that aggressiveness invites your passiveness, and so on until something or someone hits the fan.
As such, both find it easy to communicate with each other; they won't have to try to cushion their message or filter it; but can afford to be direct without being afraid of offending the other party.
In decision-making, both parties use a logical, objective analysis to access pros and cons. This same mode of decision-making will mean that they are less likely to come into conflict. Struggles While both are logical with one another, sometimes some romance and affection can liven up the relationship; both parties may have issues showing it. Because both use a logical and objective process in decision-making, they may have a blind spot in considering their personal values. Under stress, they may have an issue controlling their own emotions; sometimes this can lead to highly intense fights that are destructive.
Judging-Perceiving Joys Judgers enjoy making decisions for the relationship while Perceivers are happy just to let Judgers do so. Perceivers are happy to go with the flow according to the Judger's opinions, and they are generally okay with most casual decisions. Because of their organized and scheduled nature, Judgers bring a stability and order to the otherwise messy and spontaneous lives of Perceivers - something that the Perceivers greatly appreciate.
Perceivers, on the other hand, help Judgers to lighten up and see the fun side of life, bidding them to be less serious and uptight about everything - something that the Judgers know they need a reminder of. Struggles However, Judgers find Perceivers to be too passive and casual with their indecisiveness - Sometimes this gets on the nerves of Judgers. Judgers find that Perceivers care little about household organization, something which they value highly.